there are times i rly wish i had the opportunity to interview more ppl.. learning much about love and patience from this auntie. addiction to drugs/ alcohol are seen as such huuuuge sins n wrongs.. but aiya, what makes us all any better?

here’s my heart Lord, take and seal it – seal it for Thy courts above

aiyoh this song.. guess most swks can resonate.

I can’t unfeel your pain
I can’t undo what’s done
I can’t send back the rain
But if I could I would
My love, my arms are open
So when you feel like you can’t take another round of being broken
My arms are open
And when you’re losing faith and every door around you keeps on closing
My arms are open
I can’t uncry your tears
I can’t rewind the time
I can’t unsay what’s said
In your crazy life
My love, my arms are open
Oh, and when you’re cursing at the sky
And thinking, “lord, you must be joking”
My arms are open
And, and when you’re looking in the mirror
Thinking that, “my life is over”
My arms are open

it’s really not happening for my brain tonight.. gotta stop doing things in bits n pieces n losing my train of thought all the time. but today was interesting hahah to see how the biggest 头 can face similar challenges n dilemmas as we do cos we r all under the same laws.. how the NEA mozzie check can be used to gain entry into one’s home for protection of life cos we r powerless haha actually quite funny we like to joke tt it’s being ‘resourceful’ but under what circumstances wld tt b permissible?? feelsssssssss excited to work agn hahahhaha iz true what they say you forget abt clients when they are out of sight…. hais. all this fear of ‘adulting’ and committing they r rly starting to get in the way.. also seeing batchmates tt i havent seen for the entire sem was nice ^^ quite funny to know tt next time i may call another agency for referral or what and the person on the other end of the line cld be one of those who made v retarded jokes or were super enthu in class/ always late/ always seen on tele or fb in class/ best or worst proj mates hahahahahaaa. the human heart thinks it knows what it wants.. but only God knows best. it’s hard to explain anything at all. think greater self awareness is needed.. all these thoughts aiyoh……. but this iz only the beginning. :’)

I long to dwell in your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of your wings…
… Then I will ever sing in praise of your name and fulfill my vows day after day
– Psalm 61:4 & 8 (NIV)

pdds are the bane of my life… along w tight costumes…….. time to eat less at night again hais sad

slowly learning to appreciate the beauty in transitions and details….. in smallness n in being contained. welp thr’s so much to learn u know to be like a better dancer, better social worker, better child of God, better friend, better sister, better daughter…. am i doing this all wrong or what ah?? feels like i cant do anything justice but maybe tts the point right- i cant. 

explaining yourself becomes less important as you get older- it takes so much effort, and people could misunderstand anyway. does it mean ‘being understood’ isnt as impt anymore, or does one do it to avoid possible disappointment? maybe i should be owning these thoughts: is this what i do to cut my losses?

this cny i was reminded abt how much of a blessing it is for a family to be able to come together for a meal. even if relatives seem to be asking the same questions and can never seem to remember what stage of life you’re at.. how could we blame them, since we meet so infrequently? it’s funny because as we get older you actually can make a conscious choice to create conversations that are meaningful to you too but we dont do it. we complain about how our relatives are just making small talk and arent really interested in our lives- but how interested are we in theirs? arent we doing just the same? why is it so hard to be genuinely interested in their lives too and not just our own?? is anyone’s worth less than another, somehow? it’s so hard to understand sometimes (and frustrating) why we cant just choose to take the first freaking step, we humans are weird irritating creatures. all this will never happen. i just wish things could be easier for everyone and this is how it looks like in my head. after everything, am just grateful most of us were healthy enough to spend the two+ days together. who knows how many more of such days we have? all these question marks reminds me of placement, reflection log and esther. guess i really am bothered.

23 and still cannot understand this ambivalence rgd humans. at least this yr i learnt abt the significance of min jiang kueh in my dad’s FOO. it’s nice/ scary to know that so much of your FOO sticks with you till you grow old.

How does a moment last forever?How can a story never die?

It is love we must hold onto

Never easy, but we try

Sometimes our happiness is captured

Somehow, our time and place stand still

Love lives on inside our hearts and always wil